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You Can't Stand Under His Umbrella

Previously: When Jay wouldn't commit to Whitney, his roommate Adam convinced him to lock it down. Yes boys, make sure to commit to a girl when your friend tells you to, not when you feel like it.

Jay and Whitney go on a double date with Adam and Allie, a model from Cali who is basically living with the boys now. "We're good men, you know?" Jay says. Ooh! Foreshadowing!

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Hold On For Deah Life, Mate

Previously: Whitney was burdened with Erin's love problems, when last week's boyfriend Duncan is suddenly upgraded to "guy from her past," so she got her own apartment--but not her own "I love you" from Jay.

There's some kind of Big Event happening at DVF, a Wonder Woman tie-in complete with pink VIP carpet, but Olivia still has time to cattily chastise Whitney for not knowing the abbreviation "social" for "socialites." (Uh, because she totes made it up, are we right?) After Diane von Furstenberg HERSELF shows up and gives Whit the nod, Olivia even doles out an, "I'm so happy for you." Burn noticed!

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"They Are Cutthroat! They Are Evil!"

Previously: Whitney moved to New York and started her job at Diane von Furstenberg, where she met potential frenemy Olivia Palermo. Olivia invited her and Aussie boytoy Jay to a dinner party uptown, at which he at first refused to show, then came and swept Whit away. In the second half of last week's double-feature, Whitney hears from Model Alex, her "Hills" fling in New York, that Jay is fooling around with his ex. Then Alex and Jay get into a fight at a club, because NYC is all tough like that.

Time for apartment hunting! Whitney's been staying with her friend Erin but now that her new Canadian boyfriend Duncan is visiting, it's getting a little crowded in there. Jay finds her an amazing 30th-floor apartment--but is he really going to be around?

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Everything's Coming Up Whitney

Ooh la la! Whitney Port paired a Longchamp with a hoodie at LAX on Tuesday. A little vacation from your new job already? Must be swell!

Whether or not you watched the premiere of Whitney's show "The City," MTV will be keeping it since it instantly drew almost the entire audience who would normally watch "The Hills." Does this mean Port will get mobbed in more airports? She probably hopes not.

We're still pinning more of our hopes on Brody Jenner's "Bromance" for Monday night entertainment.

Related Stories:
· "The City" Series Premiere: I Wish They All Could Be California Girls [Jaunted]
· Whitney Port: Kinda Like Growing Up [Jaunted]
· Celeb Travel coverage [Jaunted]

[Photo: JustJared]

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I Wish They All Could Be California Girls

Last night was the premiere of "The City," MTV's latest spinoff of "Laguna Beach" featuring "Hills" co-star Whitney Port in the big, bad city of New York. Since "The Hills"' season finale was last week, this was what we had to work with. Was it fantastic? No, but at least it's promising.

Whitney arrived at her new job at Diane von Furstenberg in full Fashion Week--disbelief, suspended!--with so much to do and a snobby new costar, Olivia to contend with. (That's Olivia Palermo, socialite best known previously for wearing headbands inappropriately and working on a never-completed documentary about human trafficking. Yet she's a PR maven now?) In Part I of last night's Citystravaganza, Whitney survived the DVF fashion show and managed to score an invite for herself and Aussie love interest Jay to Olivia's TriBeCa dinner party. But Jay wouldn't go--WTF?--so she brought new, bangtastic roommate Erin. (That is, she has great bangs. What did you think we meant?)

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Kinda Like Growing Up

Previously: Lauren and Audrina made up, improbably; Stephanie felt slighted by Spencer, probably.

Tonight was another one of those irritating "Time to set up all the good stuff!" episodes with which "The Hills" seems plagued of late. So we'll cut to the chase: Next week on "The Hills," Spencer and Heidi get hitched (as you've all no doubt seen) and Whitney moves to New York City for her new job (as you've all no doubt heard).

That said, here's what happened in our favorite non-neighborhood this week: Thanks to the watchful eye of Kelly Cutrone, Whitney flew to New York City to interview at Diane von Furstenberg. Even though she was only staying in New York for the day, she managed to catch up with her Australian crush Jay, who seemed strangely giddy to see her. How do we know he's her crush?

Very, very subtle.

This is supposed to be the A-plot but there's not much suspense to it. Besides, no real boss finds job interviews for her underlings, with all deference to Grande Dame Cutrone. Even in fake reality TV, we have rules.

Meanwhile, on the West Coast: Lauren's parents are leaving Laguna Beach, so she and Lo (Lo!!!) drive up for the day to pack up LC's adolescent bedroom, including such gems as her old will ("P.S., I would like to be buried in my homecoming dress with my crown on my coffin") and Baby's First Cell Phone:

Tee hee. It's all sad and such, but LC resolves to make LA more like home from now on, despite leaving behind the most Normalsville parents ever:

You have to wonder what they think of this MTV foofaraw, don't you?

Also, Stephanie was back on, then back off again with Cameron, the guy from earlier in the season who didn't defend her ardently enough. ZZZ. Onto the tears and creepy Heidi responding to "Mrs. Pratt."

Related Stories:
· Last Week's Hills: "Disgusting And Embarrassing" [Jaunted]
· Two Weeks Ago: What Is There To Talk About? [Jaunted]
· Celeb Travel coverage [Jaunted]

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The Bar Whitney Port Partied At Last Night

This is "The City" she lives in: A friend of a friend was out in NoLIta last night when she got handed a release form for--OMG!--Whitney Port's new New York-based reality show.

Port and posse were at Southside, a new lounge (formerly known as Bella's) operated by Anthony Martignetti which just opened last month. BlackBook described the new joint, complete with bottle service and dance floor, as "bustling [and] boisterous," but New York society blog Guest of a Guest called it "an expensive dive bar" and its money-grubbing efforts "highway robbery."

Port was spotted at a Beverly Hills salon on Tuesday getting her hair done, which is odd because last time we checked New York had salons too. "The City" premieres December 29 on MTV.

Related Stories:
· OMG! "Hills" Spinoff Preview Surfaces On Aftershow [Jaunted]
· Pink Shirts Welcome [NYT]
· The Hills coverage [Jaunted]

[Photo from Southside's opening: GoaG]

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Hills Spinoff Travel: Long-Suffering Whitney Finally Gets Own Show

Her appearances on "The Hills" this season, apart from one memorable episode, have mostly been limited to asking LC about her drama. Now Whitney Port cashes in with her own series set in New York with herself in the spotlight.

Rumors about Whitney getting her own show have been running rampant for a few seasons--ever since she went to New York and tangled with SuperIntern Emily, really--but the blonde buddy Lauren met while interning at Teen Vogue a century ago finally confirmed the news. She'll be living in NYC and working for Diane von Furstenberg, whose show she was spotted at last month during Fashion Week.

We were hoping MTV would call the show something like, "The Skyscrapers" or "The Rivers" or "The New Jersey," but they've already allegedly decided on the name of the show and it's "The City."

Related Stories:
· It's Official: Whitney Port Gets Reality Show! [US Magazine]
· Post-Super Bowl Travel: Whitney Doesn't Take Sides [Jaunted]
· Celeb Travel coverage [Jaunted]