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We Just Got Off a Ryanair Flight, and This is What We Thought Of It

On Friday, we told you that you'd never believe what we did the day before, and to tell you the truth, we still can't believe it ourselves. Who flies from Brussels-Charleroi in Belgium up to Edinburgh, Scotland for less than 20 Euro for two people? It would be impossible if we weren't talking about notoriously low-cost European carrier Ryanair here.

They're the airline we love to hate, what with their hidden fees and an insane CEO, but although it seems like a mess to the outsider, all's quiet on the western front.

See what we mean, after the jump.

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You Won't Believe What We Did Yesterday

Boarding our plane at Brussels-Charleroi Airport

Tangoing with the enemy?! Yes, it's true—yesterday, after a few years away (since 2006!) from them in which time much has changed—we flew on Ryanair.

Our flight was only two hours long, but that's the mean flight time for this European low cost airline, which is so low cost that they're notorious for two things: selling flights for 1 Euro and brainstorming all sorts of hidden fees. Since we scored this one-way flight for two people for exactly 14 Euro total and then bragged all about it, we were fully expecting to get what we paid for—the worst flight of our life. Instead, we experienced one of the most eye-opening flights of our life, in both good and bad ways.

We're kind of still fully processing our thoughts on the flight, so be prepared for next week when we unleash fully on what went down and what makes us both fearful of and optimistic for the future of air travel. But we will leave you with this: we actually did the flight with no extra fees levied!

Related Stories:
· It Can Be Done! We Booked a Ryanair Flight for Under $25 [Jaunted]
· Ryanair news [Jaunted]

[Photo: Jaunted]

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The Ryanair Pay-to-Pee Scheme Is Totally Happening

We are due to fly the on low-cost, much-hated European carrier Ryanair in just over 48 hours, and already we're freaking out about if our carry-on bags are small enough to avoid extra fees. But now we're worried about even more than that! Ryanair has reaffirmed their commitment to making the dreaded in-flight "Pee Fee" happen.

At first, the announcement of charging 1 Euro per airplane bathroom visit was a publicity stunt, but when Ryanair CEO Michael O'Leary gets a money-making scheme in his head...you know it's not a joke. Ryanair is reportedly looking to install pay toilets on flights under one hour, which would affect most UK-Ireland routes and the occasional other European short hop. Luckily our flight comes in at just over an hour, so we'd not have to deal with keeping a Euro coin handy just in case, but still.

It gets worse, after the jump.

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Ryanair Kicks Off 2010 By Taking On UK Consumer Rights Agency

Refusing to sit on the laurels of their solid 2009 finish, where they were dubbed the worst family brand, Irish LCC Ryanair is starting 2010 with a flourish. Less than a week into the new year, the airline is already in a tiff with the UK's Office of Fair Trading, which had the audacity to complain about the airline's brazen abuse of consumer protection regulations.

Ryanair more or less charges £5 per person—that's per ticket, not per order—on every online booking. Some people might say "hey, if there is a universal £5 charge on every ticket, that's not a fee as much as it is a ticket that costs £5 over the listed price." And that would be true, except Ryanair has until now allowed customers to avoid the fee if they booked with the no-one's-ever-heard-of-it Visa Electron card. That way they could dodge UK regulations on ticket pricing—in theory anyone could avoid the fee—while still reaping the extra few pounds from the vast majority of customers.

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The Hottest Gift This Season: Ryanair Ticket Vouchers?

It turns out that Ryanair, an airline best known for enthusiastically abusing its customers and then throwing hissy fits when it get criticized, is conducting quite the business with their holiday gift vouchers. At first we thought this was just people giving each other gag gifts. But given the sheer volume of the vouchers they're selling, we're now considering the possibility that families are giving them in the spirit of affection. What a sad, dark existence those people must lead:

The carrier is on target to sell over 20,000 of the gift vouchers this Christmas, as the airline believes that the surge in gift vouchers is a response to its commitment to lower fairs (sic) by 20 per cent, making vouchers 20 per cent better value to shoe who receive one as a Christmas present. The Christmas Gift Vouchers are available for purchase on Ryanair’s website, allowing people to buy an alternative to high cost gifts with low cost, great value and high impact. The Ryanair gift vouchers will also allow people to see their friends and family and to take advantage of a great value city, ski or sun break next year.

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Hand Rails In Planes? Pee Fees Donated To The Incontinent? Ryanair's Crazy CEO Speaks

Listen here, Michael O'Leary, CEO of Ryanair, when you recently talked with the Wall Street Journal about your vision and your ideas for the future of low-cost airlines, you sounded both crazy and wise. And you know who typically sounds crazywise? Prophets. We're definitely not about to bow down to you, but you might have something there when you talk about in-flight paying-to-pee and standing room-only; you did after all begin the charging for checked bags thing before most others, and now it's almost standard, and on legacy carriers.

Still, you are one crazy businessman. Especially when you say things like this:

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It Can Be Done! We Booked A Ryanair Flight For Under $25

If there's any single airline we'd rather not fly (other than Aeroflot, that is), it's got to be the Irish low cost carrier Ryanair. Boy oh boy, have we called them some names in the past, all the while unearthing their nickel-and-diming schemes to possibly charge passengers to use the bathroom and allow smoking on flights. But, with a European trip on our horizon, we're willing to let bygones be bygones and fly the fee-riddled skies of Ryanair.

In fact, we have a somewhat fond memory of our last Ryanair flight— a roundtrip from Rome-Ciampino to Barcelona-Girona that cost us a total of $45, not counting bus fare. But those were the days before Ryanair removed check-in desks and expanded their routes to irresistible locations. So, this past weekend while needing some time away from the Thanksgiving table, we visited the Ryanair website and yes—we bought tickets on a flight. The grand total for two passengers on a one-way flight from Brussels-Charleroi to Edinburgh? 14 Euro.

The shockingly low fare explained, after the jump.

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Survey Identifies Ryanair As The Worst Family Brand

You can scoff at us as we take our recurring and regular potshots at Ryanair, but you can't scoff at science. 1,500 people were surveyed using some vague methodology by some random outfit interested in "family brands." Thus surveyed, they collectively indicated that the Irish low cost carrier—which has been known to make a point of informing customers that they'll take abuse because they're cheap—ranked at the very bottom.

Key concepts like socially responsibly, good listening, caring, and family values were all tested. We have very little idea what any of those mean in a social scientific context, and we're skeptical they could be applied to airlines. But we do know that they're Good Things and that Ryanair ranked dead last when evaluated on them. So whatever else we know about this survey, we do know that it was more or less accurate. We remind you again to put aside whatever skepticism you might have since this is science:

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Ryanair Taunts British Airways: 'We're (About To Be) #1!'

It's no secret that Ryanair has translated their "Customers Suck" philosophy into one quarter of breakout profits after another.

It's also no secret that we kind of loathe them and everything they stand for (excepting low airfare), which makes this particular story, about how the low cost carrier is poised to pass British Airways as the largest airline in the UK, as predictable as it is aggravating. Try to contain your shock when we tell you that they're being obnoxiously smug about the whole thing:

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Ryanair Throws Huge Hissy Fit In Response To BBC Expose

Ryanair is in a very public, very heated, very crazy delicious feud with the BBC. The low cost carrier has taken exception to a BBC Panorama expose unpacking the airline's complex nickle and dime strategy for extracting airline fees. In response, Ryanair's the-customer-is-always-wrong CEO Michael O'Leary has blasted the program and unveiled a 1.1 million seat giveaway.

We were surprised Ryanair reacted so negatively to a discussion of their opaque fees. Usually they're so much more confident. Just a few weeks ago they were blustering about how their customers were free to explore other options if they had problems with the airline.

This is a company that's made a business model of brazenly abusing passengers, the implicit justification being that any alienated customers could always be replaced by other bargain seekers. "You'll take our abuse because you value your wallet more than your self-esteem" is practically the company's sneering motto.

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LCCs Now Bragging About How They're Not Screwing Over Customers

EasyJet and Air Berlin tracked down reporters this morning to announce that, in sharp contrast to Ryanair, they will not be removing their check-in desks from the airports they service. The airlines, in a bit of a throwback, cited the concept of "service" as the basis for their decision. How quaint:

'To have somebody in the airport you can ask questions to, and to take baggage for free, is a crucial part of our service,' said Alexandra Mueller, a spokeswomen for Air Berlin, Europe’s third-largest low-fare carrier... EasyJet, Europe’s No. 2 discount carrier, has 'no plans to go down the Ryanair route,' said Samantha Day, a company spokeswoman. The Luton, England-based airline may introduce free online check-in for all passengers this winter, she said. Now, only customers traveling with hand baggage can check in online.

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Ryanair Kills Airport Check-In Desks, Forces All Customers To Pay To Check In Online

Ryanair has finally taken the plunge and formally scrapped their airport check-in desks. This move was largely symbolic since the airline had already banned airport check-ins for tickets purchased after May. And yet, in what will come as a surprise to no one, they're still managing to alienate watchdog groups, anger customers, and come off as general asses.

The watchdog concerns have their roots in Ryanair's older policy of charging passengers for online check-in, a penalty that the airline inexplicably levies on people who make things more efficient and cost effective. Up until now travelers could still avoid the £5-£10 fee by checking in at the airport. Now they can't and that has some people upset.

But that's not our concern. Our concern is this guy:

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