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IMcest
IMcest:: Crockett and Tubbs Needed on Miami Hotel Watch
October 27, 2006 at 4:32 PM | 0 Comments
[SFO*MEDIA editors chat about the week that was and we share their incestuous gab with you. We know what you're thinking but this is actually legal in some Southern states. Enjoy.]
Jaunted:
so all i know about nicky hilton's hotel is that it's called o, like the sound her sister usually makes
HotelChatter:
its called Nicky O. her middle name is olivia before you type a dirty joke.
Jaunted:
i would never! so you'd say "oh, i'm staying at the nicky o tonight"?
HotelChatter:
yeah. o nicky o you're so fine.
Jaunted:
your overpriced suites blow my mind
HotelChatter:
you take me by the wallet, but you show me a good time? does that work?
Jaunted:
for sure, but how much longer until miami beach sinks under the weight of hot new velvet rope clubs
HotelChatter:
i know, is miami over yet?
Jaunted:
is it over? only if this conversation is happening after the summer of '04. in new york they just made an ordinance limiting the number of bars... the same could work in Miami. Crockett and Tubbs could be enforcers.
HotelChatter:
ooh nice miami vice reference. Miami Vice 2: Hotel Crackdown
Jaunted:
can you say "crack" when talking about miami vice?
For more of the titillating IM convo head on over to HotelChatter who has the other half.
IMcest
IMcest :: Numb the Pain with Tanqueray
October 20, 2006 at 5:10 PM | 0 Comments
[SFO*MEDIA editors chat about the week that was and we share their incestuous gab with you. We know what you're thinking but this is actually legal in some Southern states. Enjoy.]
Jaunted:
Since I've been in Japan for a while, you need to update me on the latest socialite news
HotelChatter:
which would you rather hear abt? nicky hilton's "nude" photo shoot? or lindsay lohan leaving shit behind at the chateau marmont.
Jaunted:
LL forever, she's such a ridiculous person
HotelChatter:
so she left behind a bottle of tanqueray, crackberries and some copies of the NYPost. coincidentally the ny post was the one to report this.
Jaunted:
of course they were, i'm sure they loved it .. i hear all the starlets are like actually friends with those people anyway. feeding them stories etc
HotelChatter:
i am more shocked lindsay can stomach tanqueray
Jaunted:
what else would she numb the pain from that ginormous boob job anyway, she has prob been on it for a while
HotelChatter:
i am glad someone invented vodka tonicas thats all i'll use when i get my boobies done
Jaunted:
i don't drink but...i did try patron once...it was tasty ..on an ritz carlton club floor no less! it was free
HotelChatter:
ritz carlton serves patron? maybe i change my mind about them now...
Jaunted:
when i get my "procedure" done, it will be..patron...if someone buys it for me
For more of the titillating IM convo skip over to HotelChatter who has the other half.
IMcest
IMcest :: starwood uses badd gramar skilz to promoat newest ho-tel
October 13, 2006 at 4:57 PM | 0 Comments
[SFO*MEDIA editors chat about the week that was and we share their incestuous gab with you. We know what you're thinking but this is actually legal in some Southern states. Enjoy.]
Jaunted:
what is up with starwood's interest in lowercase hotel names?
HotelChatter:
i know they must think its clever but its really annoying. not to mention bad grammar
Jaunted:
wouldn't it be unfortunate if you confused the new hotel concept with that crappy new Honda model? "at element, our rooms are bigger than an Element"
HotelChatter:
haha fit all your junk in the trunk at element
Jaunted:
extended stay? we've got room for all your crap
HotelChatter:
from now on, Starwood will now be known as starwood and element will always be followed by a honda car joke
Jaunted:
i'd be happier if they uppercased the E and put extra power outlets in and didn't charge me $7 for a coke to mix with my whisky
HotelChatter:
ooh that's the second time you mentioned whiskey today. is there something i should know abt?
Jaunted:
yeah, it's friday
For more of the titillating IM convo skip over to HotelChatter who has the other half.
IMcest
IMcest: The Ass Man Beats out THOR
October 6, 2006 at 2:30 PM | 0 Comments
[SFO*MEDIA editors chat about the week that was and we share their incestuous gab with you. We know what you're thinking but this is actually legal in some Southern states. Enjoy.]
Jaunted:
looking at hotelchatter's downtown NYC hotel map, if you had to check into one place on the map, where would you stay?
HotelChatter:
Hmmm...maybe the Mercer. I haven't stayed there and Andre usually does it up right.
Jaunted:
open since 1998, would you consider that ancient in NY hotel years? or does that just mean they've actually had enough time to learn to run it correctly?
HotelChatter:
it's definitely an ancient boutique hotel but not like the waldorf or anything. where would you stay if you had to? you know in case your apt was being renovated/not fumigated?
Jaunted:
I think I would like to check out ol' Thor to be honest, if only for the people watching...you know, all those real Wisconsin people on the LES
HotelChatter:
and lots of Euros
Jaunted:
Actually, i change my pick to the Tribeca grand, I decided i want to meet the ass man.
HotelChatter:
Careful for what you wish for!
For more of the titillating IM convo skip over to HotelChatter who has the other half.
IMCest
IMCest: Lonely Highway
September 29, 2006 at 3:00 PM | 0 Comments
[SFO*MEDIA editors chat about the week that was and we share their incestuous gab with you. We know what you're thinking, but this is actually legal in some Southern states. Enjoy.]
Jaunted: So what scam did you attempt in Houston?
HotelChatter: Well, I was in the airport last week on layover--thankfully, it was short--and I tried to hitch a ride on an airport car.
Jaunted: Damn! Was it a long walk or were you just being lazy?
HotelChatter: A little of both. Mostly it was a looooong trip between gates.
Jaunted: I'm convinced they do that with any flight from L.A. Make those Angelenos walk, I say!
HotelChatter: Well, my east coast legs got me where I wanted to go, eventually. Have you ever hitched a ride on those?
Jaunted: Nah. I'm not sure how I could.
HotelChatter: Yeah, beats me how to do it. Flirting or faking an injury, maybe?
Jaunted: If you brought some crutches, I'm sure they'd give you a lift. But isn't it less work just to walk?
To continue with the brother sister love fest IM, head over to HotelChatter.
Imcest
IMCest: Paris is Burning
September 22, 2006 at 2:15 PM | 0 Comments
[SFO*MEDIA editors chat about the week that was and we share their incestuous gab with you. We know what you're thinking, but this is actually legal in some Southern states. Enjoy.]
Jaunted: Was it just last week that Ian Schrager banned Paris Hilton?
HotelChatter: You bet!
Jaunted: What happened? I heard he banned her and "her ilk".
HotelChatter: He sure did. Of course, he let in Winona Ryder--shoplifter--and Lil' Kim--convicted perjurer. But not Paris.
Jaunted: Wow, that's impressive on her part. Maybe she's too clean--no convictions. Yet.
HotelChatter: It's not the only place that she's been banned, either. There's a Hitlon in Scotland that banned her, too.
Jaunted: Banned by her own family?
HotelChatter: Oh, they don't own the hotels anymore. Just Nicky, who's opening her own brand of hotels in the fall. At least she'll be able to stay there.
Jaunted: Yeah, if Nicky banned her, that would be some accomplishment.
To continue with the brother sister love fest IM, head over to HotelChatter.
IMCest
IMCest: Do Not Feed the Models
August 25, 2006 at 2:45 PM | 0 Comments
[SFO*MEDIA editors chat about the week that was and we share their incestuous gab with you. We know what you're thinking, but this is actually legal in some Southern states. Enjoy.]
Jaunted: Where are they stowing the celebs in L.A. these days?
HotelChatter: At the Sunset Marquis. Owen Wilson used to stay there... and coincidentally Chris Robinson, Kate hudson's ex, is staying there now!
Jaunted: Ooh. I guess that's where she likes to stash her men. What's the draw (for the hotel, not the men)?
HotelChatter: I think it's one of those places where they let you do whatever you want. Brad Pitt stayed there, too.
Jaunted: Ahh. Sounds like "whatever you want" entails activities that cause the munchines and make South Park seem extra-hilarious.
HotelChatter: Do hotels ever have restrictions when it comes to celebs? I mean, Lohan practically runs the Chateau Marmont.
Jaunted: I suppose it depends on the celeb.
HotelChatter: I think the marmont has a segregated area for celebs, even. Sheesh.
Jaunted: You know, if La Lohan stayed with my (imaginary) hotel, I'd let her roam free. You can't confine the Lohan, people.
To continue with the brother sister love fest IM, head over to HotelChatter.
IMCest
IMCest: How Much is that Hottie in the Window?
August 18, 2006 at 2:45 PM | 0 Comments
[SFO*MEDIA editors chat about the week that was and we share their incestuous gab with you. We know what you're thinking, but this is actually legal in some Southern states. Enjoy.]
Jaunted: So tell me about you stay at the Grammercy Park Hotel in 10,000 words or less.
HotelChatter: The place is very cool, but game-changing? Only a maybe.
Jaunted: What parts ARE game-changing about it?
HotelChatter: The service-oriented hotties who worked there are, for sure, but the problem is you have to be okay with shelling out $550 for a room.
Jaunted: Yikes! That's a lot for hotties.
HotelChatter: Despite the hotties, the place does not have a modern feel; its more like gothic english castle. My friend said the place reminded her of sex.
Jaunted: Hmm. Sounds like another slick hotel to me. I'd rather have old club chairs and ancient bartenders than service hotties for that much dough.
HotelChatter: Hey! For $550 a night, I expect hotties.
Jaunted: Ha! Hard to argue with that price point, I suppose.
To continue with the brother sister love fest IM, head over to HotelChatter.
IMCest
IMCest: Between Heaven(ly Beds) and Earth
August 11, 2006 at 2:10 PM | 0 Comments
[SFO*MEDIA editors chat about the week that was and we share their incestuous gab with you. We know what you're thinking, but this is actually legal in some Southern states. Enjoy.]
Jaunted: Where did you stay for the HC this week?
HotelChatter: I stayed at the westin times sq with a friend for threee nights this week.
Jaunted: Ew, on purpose?
HotelChatter: My friend was in town for three nights, and I was like, I can sleep in a Heavenly Bed!
Jaunted: And how was the bed? That good?
HotelChatter: The bed rocks. It's softy, cushy, and you get FIVE pillows!
Jaunted: I', excited when I find a third pillow in the hotel room closet. That's awesome.
HotelChatter: The gym's nice, too, with a good view of the Hudson. Sadly, there were WAY too many children there. Yuck.
Jaunted: Children: The new ban after smoking? Let's hope so.
To continue with the brother sister love fest IM, head over to HotelChatter.
IMCest
IMCest: Keeping Off the Pole
August 4, 2006 at 3:45 PM | 0 Comments
[SFO*MEDIA editors chat about the week that was and we share their incestuous gab with you. We know what you're thinking, but this is actually legal in some Southern states. Enjoy.]
Jaunted: What's this I hear about the Hooters Casino? Is it heaven on earth or what?
HotelChatter: Yeah, we spoke with the guy who helps organize bachelors for visitors to the Hooters Casino in Vegas.
Jaunted: Was he helpful, or trying to make Hooters seem fancy?
HotelChatter: Not at all. He was so cool, and wants to help visitors do whatever they want, even if he can't make it happen himself. You know, for certain kinds of activities...
Jaunted: So no to the nose candy, but he could probably find me a pair of orange spandex shorts, if I was into that kind of thing.
HotelChatter: Definitely. I only wish I had put forth more crazy scenarios. Every question i asked was answered first with "well, we can do anything. Depends on what you want."
Jaunted: Awesome, though it's better to imagine the Hooters girls saying that. What crazy things can he actually do?
HotelChatter: He says that if bachelors want a stripper pole in the room, it's totally do-able.
Jaunted: Wow. I get excited when there's a mint on my pillow--that's a whole different smoke.
To continue with the brother sister love fest IM, head over to HotelChatter.
IMCest
IMCest: Are you Here for the Affair?
July 28, 2006 at 2:30 PM | 0 Comments
[SFO*MEDIA editors chat about the week that was and we share their incestuous gab with you. We know what you're thinking, but this is actually legal in some Southern states. Enjoy.]
Jaunted: Is it true that Mariott banned smoking in their hotels?
HotelChatter: Yep. Marriott decided to ban smoking from every room of their north american hotels. The euros aren't ready for a ban like that, I guess.
Jaunted: From a money standpoint, it's not a bad idea. Those rooms smell bad.
HotelChatter: Yes, and it costs money to clean/air 'em out. But marriott has banned smoking from the hotel's public spaces, so smokers can only smoke in designated areas. Which are 25 feet from the hotel, natch.
Jaunted: Poor smokers. They probably have to stand somewhere in the middle of the parking lot.
HotelChatter: What will people do without their post-coital hotel sex cigarrette, though?
Jaunted: True, but then again, if you're shacking up in the mariott, it's not a glamorous tryst in the first place.
HotelChatter: Thats all the more reason to have the cigarette. Trying to bring back a little coolness to your skanky Mariott sex encounter.
Jaunted: It's sexier than the Super 8, at least.
To continue with the brother sister love fest IM, head over to HotelChatter.
IMCest
IMCest: Sibling Rivalry
July 21, 2006 at 2:30 PM | 0 Comments
[SFO*MEDIA editors chat about the week that was and we share their incestuous gab with you. We know what you're thinking, but this is actually legal in some Southern states. Enjoy.]
Jaunted: So what are those wacky Hilton sisters up to now?
HotelChatter: Paris Hilton and Nicky Hilton are having hotel wars! If I were Nicky I would be pissed. Bitch, step off!
Jaunted: If I were Nicky I would be pissed that Paris is my sister. Paris opening a hotel too?
HotelChatter: Yes, she says it will be real high end like the Sanderson in London, "but cool", and it will probably open in Las Vegas.
Jaunted: What are Nicky's hotels like? Classier? 75% less skanky?
HotelChatter: Nicky O hotels are going to be all sorts of fashionista. Fashion designers will do special suites, and there will be minicupcakes on the bed instead of chocolates.
Jaunted: Minicupcakes? Won't that make crumbs on the bed? I'm not sold on that.
HotelChatter: Oh, and the hotels will all smell like gardenias.
Jaunted: that's definitely better than how Paris' hotel is gonna smell, I can tell you that right now.
To continue with the brother sister love fest IM, head over to HotelChatter.
