· If it's because of a medical situation
Unless you are a doctor, stay put and enjoy the early landing that comes with medical emergencies on planes. This means that there is nothing wrong with the plane itself, and usually the issue is isolated to one passenger. In some cases, you might land at the closest airport and not your ticketed destination, but they've got to get you there eventually.
You may be delayed in arriving by hours or a day, but the airline will typically shuffle you onto a waiting plane to continue the flight once they've dropped off the sick passengers. No worries, mon.
· If it's because of mechanical issues
This is the more troubling instance, when something is the matter with the thing in which you are flying through the air. But the fact that you are still flying, and haven't dropped out of the sky yet, is a great sign. Remain calm, pay attention to the flight attendants, and commit the plane safety card to memory while waiting for landing, since you will most likely be disembarking onto the tarmac via the inflatable exit slides. Once you are out of the plane an on the ground, run like hell away from it; the crew will tell you in which direction, but just get to safe area ASAP even if your plane isn't aflame.
· If it's because of an unruly passenger
The folks arrested for messing with the flight crew and being unruly these last few weeks may have seemed trivial, since they did things like made a threatening statement on a comment card, harassed a fellow passenger and generally became irate, but it is all taken very seriously. In cases where the passenger is a credible threat to the flight, the flight crew (and hopefully air marshals on board, or brave fellow passengers) will restrain the person and bring them as far away from harming others as possible. Depending on the severity of the threat, your plane may land at the first available airport or continue on to destination.
Again there is no need to panic and add to the melee; wherever your plane lands you'll eventually end up at your destination, you just might also get a network news interview with it.
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· Emergency Landings [Jaunted]
[Photo: Duke Geren]


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