But the plot thickens: Gabriel has been looking for funding for his third-world WiFi startup, which business he blamed for not telling Poppy right away he had swanned off with her blonde friend. Serena gets him to replace those investors at her building's co-op meeting (but wait, I thought she lived in the Palace?), but evidence suggests there is no start-up, just a pair of grifters... no... make that one grifter, as Gabriel ditches Poppy with all the money. A blond WASPy Southern version of Bernie Madoff, nicknamed the North Caroliar? Best. Show. Ever.
The saddest victim of Gabriel's fraud: Rufus, who turns to him to reap some easy profits that will allow him to send Dan to Yale without selling the Lincoln Hawk catalogue after the gallery failed to sell immediately. (We'll give him $5 never to play this song again.) Gabe tried to turn him down, but Rufus insisted -- which means he will probably be moving in much sooner with his loaded girlfriend. Fifth time's the charm for Lily van der Bassphrey?
Blair's escapades, while they helped Serena out, have further strained her relationship with Nate. After she refuses to take the subway between Columbia and NYU to maintain their relationship, Nate leases a one-bedroom apartment in Murray Hill halfway between the schools so they can live together and be together all the time. Unfortunately, a little road trip with Chuck convinces Blair that she doesn't want to move in with Nate, nor does she trust Chuckles either. What's a girl to do?
And there's more trouble coming the Waldorf way: To try and figure out who Gabriel is, Chuck and Blair drive out to some kind of weird institution where Georgina is being held. Turns out she's found Jesus now! She bears malice towards no one! Except probably Blair, and Chuck just offered her a ride back into the city. We predict a relapse in 3... 2... 1...
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