What Blair hadn't counted on was that one of her handmaidens is a turncoat. When the dying-for-Yale Nelly Yuki rats her out, Blair is expelled, and the school calls an emergency meeting (on a Saturday night, no less!) to discuss online honor codes and the mean meaniness of some meanies out there. But Blair gets the chance to exonerate herself when Serena spots Dan and Ms. Carr out again -- in a decidedly non-professorial pose -- and takes the photo to the headmistress.
Clearly, Constance needs to get its house in order. Even if Ms. Carr followed the letter of the law by not making out with Dan until she was already fired, she clearly dug her own grave by appearing with him in public off school grounds, where their meetings couldn't be passed off as extra help. (And seriously, show, stop ripping on Teach for America as the source of her poor morals, or we will cut you.)
Banning cell phones or attempting to (LOL) take down Gossip Girl can't make gossip disappear, and in this case it was prescient. We'd feel sorry for Serena, but she should have figured out how fallible Dan by now. If last year's little Georgina interlude didn't clue her in, Lonelyboy has become a bit of a manslut. And so it goes.
Meanwhile, Chuck wakes up with flashes of an "Eyes Wide Shut"-style orgy and decides to find the woman who shared his good time -- only to discover she's a combination nanny-hooker who has since disappeared. We have to say, this subplot was not very exciting given Chuck could have done anything in his memory-deficient hours; must he have gotten hung up on a girl? But we did get a peek into Pandora's box when the Bass Industries heir found a box of invitations to sexy parties in his dad's safe. We knew that safe was going to pay off!
With the next new episode set to air five weeks later, we'll just have to wait to find out if Bart was some kind of sex entrepreneur or if he just liked to party -- and what crazy rules Constance Billiard will attempt to force on Blair before graduation.
· Last Week's Gossip Girl: Uh Oh. Is It War? [Jaunted]
· Three Weeks Ago: It's So Hard Finding Obedient Minions [Jaunted]
· First Appearance of the Safe: The Thanksgiving Episode [Jaunted]