Jaunted

504 p.m. Well, the good news is that it's cozy. The bad news is that the bus is still within New York City an hour after departure. Ah, the glory of Friday evening traffic.

510 p.m. Call it the JetBlue principle: While it's cool to have TV on a bus or a plane, Wolf Blitzer doesn't get any more interesting when you're in motion.

515 p.m. Oooh, there's a stewardess ('cause you can't call her a flight attendant) and she brings drinks! How friggin' civilized.

521 p.m. First impressions: Having the bus leave from the Manhattan Hilton on 53rd and 6th, and then fighting through surface streets (as Jack Bauer would say) to get to 125th street doesn't seem like the best idea. Why not leave from the Hudson Hotel? Then, the LimoLiner would already be on the west sizzle, making everyone's departure easier. And the inside of a bus is about seven times the size of a room at the Hudson Hotel, so it will seem extra luxurious.

527 p.m. Hey, when the road is bumpy, its kinda hard to type. Didn't forsee this problem. Another problem: No alcohol on board! What if we have a pathological fear of bus travel? What then, LimoLiner folks?

531 p.m. Pretty sure the Fung Wah just passed us. Those Asians totally have the weight advantage on us.

535 p.m There are two TV channels viewable on screens. One is CNN, where we can watch dear Wolfie do his thing. But why is the other showing local news, on Channel 9, no less? Oh well, we probably wouldn't find out about job cuts at the local Velcro factory anywhere else.

543 p.m. Looks like din-din may be swinging our way... options include tuna, chicken , or veggies. Hmmm... what kind of jokes did comics in the 80s make about bus food?

547 p.m. For the sake of science, we are trying the chicken sandwich. Don't say we didn't ever do anything for you guys. This is scarier than when we ate Albanian seafood.

556 p.m.That was better than we expected. It was a passable sandwich, nothing delicious though. It's missing something...flavor? Although, we didn't have to pay extra for it, unlike certain modes of transportation we know.

607 p.m. Check this out: There's a movie! In addition to totally scoring points by being in English, it also has the advantage of being pretty current. It's Red Eye. No, Rachel McAdams, don't trust Cillian Murphy! He tried to kill Batman and now he's after you! LimoLiner must be happy about showing this, because airlines don't show movies with scary things that happen on planes, as a rule but they can. I guess they wouldn't show Speed on the LimoLiner, then.

615 p.m. You know who LimoLiner needs to form a partnership with? Scores. You know, maybe for a late bus to Boston. C'mon, there's a market for it; they have strip club buses aleady. Why not strip club buses combined with travel?

621p.m. When traffic is bad, it makes us wish that there was a GPS map of where exactly on the road the bus is at any given moment. Just to know how slow we're going, exactly.

631 p.m. Some final thoughts on the LimoLiner before we start doing what everyone should be doing at 630 on a Friday evening--disco napping.

The LimoLiner is totally comforable, but is beholden to the same God the Greyhound and the Fung Wah are: traffic. Even in the lap of luxury, it's still annoying to feel like you're not moving. Maybe when they say Connecticut is speed limited for trains, they really meant for all forms of transportation? Hard to say. In the meantime, it's still a better deal, at $79 OW, than the Acela or JetBlue on all but the cheapest fares. And it comes with bonus Rachel McAdams. That's enough to give it a solid thumbs up from us.

With that, your humble editor bids you good night and happy Easter weekend.

[image via clambert/Flickr]