Jaunted

Tourism

Ugly Americans Get Schooled

April 11, 2006 at 1:56 PM | 0 Comments

Americans do not have the best reputation abroad. Whether it's a result of the Bush administration's policies or American egotism, their standing as thoughtful tourists could use some improvement. Enter non-profit group Business for Diplomatic Action.

Funded by a bunch of large American companies, the group will begin issuing a guide with sixteen tips, called the "World Citizens Guide", for Americans traveling abroad. Sadly, the tips are only mentioned in a WSJ article, which requires a subscription to read online. So, here are some of their tips, ever-so-slightly adbridged and edited by Jaunted, of course.

Avoid Boastfulness: Replace "We saved your asses in Dubya Dubya Two!" with "Thank you so much for joining the Coalition of the Willing".

Avoid Loudness: Instead of shouting "Phew! This little froggy is ripe," send a text message to your friend about it.  "P.U.! Smell you L8R, Francois," is an acceptable replacement.

Speak Slower: English as a second language speakers are more likely to respond to your request for directions if you speak to them in a clear, even tone. Speak to them as if they have a mild mental handicap, or are a very smart dog.

Dress Up: During the summer, remember to bring your dress shorts. Sweatpants with slogans on the rear end may be too casual for some religious shrines, so make sure to pack a plain grey or black pair.

Tone Down Talk of Politics: It can create an uncomfortable situation when a foreigner has a better understanding of our bicameral legislature than you do. To play it safe, ask their president's name, then make fun of how stupid it sounds if the conversation drifts towards political discussion.

Tone Down Talk of National Pride: If you are chanting "U.S.A.! U.S.A.!", make sure to do it slowly and clearly, so as ensure that locals understand what you are saying. Remember, you are a visitor in their country.

Eat Slower: Don't rush your meals--portions in McDonald's abroad can be up to one third smaller than those at home, so you'll want to pace yourself.

Yup, we're all about promoting cross-cultural understanding here at Jaunted.

[Image via MykReeve/Flickr]

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