As we know, turns out Red Square was, as the nerds said, the "psyche you out pit stop". Just a pretty backdrop for Phil and his fur. The funniest part of the whole fake pit stop scene was watching Lake get as excited as Tom Cruise on Oprah's couch only to get knocked down a peg by Phil and his fake pit stop. Once the teams arrived at the square, Phil didn't mince words, he handed them a clue and told them to get their asses to the Moscow International Airport where the racers boarded a plane for Frankfurt, then hopped an extremely clean train to Stuttgart.
On the train to Stuttgart, Eric & Jeremey, who earlier held hands in a Russian cab, met a nice guy named Johan. Was it us, or did E & J seem more in to Johan than any of the "chicks" they have "seduced" along the race thus far? Is it too early to start calling Danielle & Dani Katie Holmes and Renee Zellweger? Nice beard boys.
When racers arrived at the Mercedes-Benz factory and museum in Stuttgart, they enjoyed a sick 170 kilometers per hour drive on the oldest test track Mercedes-Benz owns. Everyone survived and headed 200 miles toward the city of Bad Tölz, which looks like an extremely cool place, in search of Ellbach Field. At this point, it was time for, what we believe marketing executives refer to as "in-line product placement", courtesy of the Travelocity ga-nome. The hippies in particular seemed to really enjoy their "No Rain" moment in the field.
With ga-nome in tote, the teams headed off to Bavarian Film where they had to choose between "Break It" and "Slap It". Surprisingly, Eric & Jeremy passed on "slapping it" and engaged in a disturbing sequence that included feigning interest in a St. Pauli girl, and breaking bottles over each others' heads. In the end, the St. Pauli girl did kiss the The Ambiguously Gay Duo, and they showed little to no real reaction, until they were a safe distance away from her, when they posed for the cameras, of course.
So what did we learn last night?
Germany is damn clean. The real "drunks", er at least one named Hans, live in Germany, not Russia, Monica. A real live Travelocity ga-nome named Peter is Phil's new sidekick, at least in Munich. Seriously, that dude looked just like one of those ga-nomes.
America's Moment of Shame:
Jeremey: This Pauli girl is pretty hot. (he said it loud enough to make sure the poor girl heard him)
People say "tongue wrestle"? Really?
Also: Don't forget to send us tips, especially if you find one of our mapped Amazing Race locations are off a bit. Help us out people!