No Fly List Exposed, Robert Johnsons Screwed
60 minutes did an exposé on the dreaded "no fly list" last night. The crack journalists obtained a copy of the super secret doc and found out it was 540 pages long, listing over 44,000 banned flyers and 75,000 pull-'em-asides. So who is on the list? Osama Bin Laden, Bolivian President Evo Morales, jailed x-Iraqi leader Saddam Hussein, and 14 of the 19 dead hijackers from 9/11. Didn't Cat Stevens make the list as well? Safety first, right?
Steve Kroft basically tells a couple no fly list mouthpieces, "you got dead people on the list."
There reaction?
"Just because a person has died doesn't mean their identity has died".
Yeah, Kip Hawley and crew are really on the ball.
In some ways we feel bad for them, as this document is nothing more than a cover your ass garbage in garbage out database.
But you know who we really feel bad for?
All the dudes with common names that get glommed onto this clusterfuck for no apparent reason.
For instance, anyone and everyone named Robert Johnson gets held up at airport security no matter what. Old dudes white dudes named Robert Johnson are strip searched. Young black dudes named Robert Johnson detained. If your name is Robert Johnson, odds are you do not look forward to flying.
How do you get off the list? Apparently congress just passed some convoluted legislation that allows citizens to apply to get on another list, which will eventually let them try to prove they don't belong on the original no fly list.
Sounds as complicated as understanding Google's search algorithm. If you have a common name, might be easier just to go to city hall and change your name to Bobby Johnny or something, just to avoid the possibility of an uncomfortable strip search the next time you fly to Palm Springs for the weekend.
Related Stories:
· Kip Hawley is an Idiot [Jaunted]
· Unlikely Terrorists On No Fly List [Jaunted]
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