Apparently there aren't any cute blond girls who've gone missing overseas lately, so someone at CNN got assigned to write up this tripe:
On a recent Southwest Airlines flight, a man dropped his pants and exposed himself to the female passenger sitting next to him, then punched her, according to an FBI affidavit. The plane was in midair, and the naked man reportedly grew angrier, screaming uncontrollably and shaking his fist in the air... 'Now people are more hyper-vigilant on what occurs on aircrafts,' said Ron Koziol, assistant section chief for the FBI's violent crimes unit, who calls airplanes a 'high-risk' environment.
Did you hear that? He shook his fist! Not only did he shake his fist, but he shook it in the air! If you continue reading this Woodward and Bernstein-like expose, you discover that there are 80 similar incidents every single year. We did some back of the napkin number crunching and concluded that, if you board a plane every morning for the next 365 days, you have a .00001% chance of seeing something that we have to deal with every single night on the way home from the bar.]]>
