The players are Brent and Caite, this season's model couple and Caite is the infamous Miss South Carolina; Carol and Brandy, a high-maintenance couple; Dana and Adrian, high school sweethearts; Jet and Cord, cowboy brothers; Jody and Shannon, a grandma-granddaughter team of triathletes; Joe and Heidi, a married couple; Dan and Jordan, cutie brothers; Jordan and Jeff, who met on Big Brother and who've been dating ever since; Louie and Michael, private detectives; Monique and Shawne, super moms/attorneys; and Steve and Allie, a former baseball coach who led the Phillies to a World Series win in '08 and his daughter.
Meanwhile, the teams start to talk about the more well-known of the bunch. "A lot of people think I'm ignorant," Miss South Carolina says. "You're gonna change your mind, I promise." Looks like someone already made up his mind. "When I saw her, I almost pooped myself," says Jordan, of the cutie brothers, who then offers a decent imitation of her nonsensical pageant speech.
The 11 teams start in downtown L.A. and their first clue directs them to LAX, but they must get there by public transportation. Not an easy feat. "Public transportation, to us, is like not using the valet parker," Carol says. The racers were smart enough to ask locals for directions. They hustle to get there, since the first three teams to arrive at the airport will make it on the first plane to Santiago, Chile, which leaves an hour earlier than the second.
The super moms, Big Brother lovers and high school sweeties make it onto the first flight, but their plane is having issues and it has to be swapped for a new aircraft. All of the teams decide not to chance a big delay and—much to the delight of the other teams—switch their tickets for the second flight.
It's a mad dash off of the plane, as all the teams have to take a bus to Valparaiso, what TAR master Phil calls the "San Francisco of Chile." Next, teams must head to the top of the Ascensor Villaseca to find the next clue.
Getting on a bus proves to be difficult, as they quickly fill up. The cowboys, in particular, have a problem boarding the bus because the bros had exchanged their American dollars for Brazilian money, not Chilean. Tsk-tsk.
In this roadblock, teams are 120 feet above the ground and have to walk a cable wire the length of a football field to get the next clue. Miss South Carolina has fun walking the rope, even appreciating the scenery, and is the first to get across. Miss Big Brother snags second. Dan falls off the cable (don't worry, they are all harnessed in), but it ends up helping him as he quickly maneuvers to the other side using only his hands. It bumps him up to third place.
Other racers weren't as lucky. A wobbly Brandy has a meltdown mid-air, threatening to throw up. Adrian inches slowly across the rope as other racers pass him by. The cowboys and triathletes lag behind, vying for last place.
Next the teams have to take the Ascensor Artilleria, one of the city's famous funiculars, to find the next clue. Their next task is to carry paint, brushes and a ladder and help repaint the city's famous brightly hued houses. The models unknowingly skip the funicular, but they can't find the houses. The Big Brother Lovers steal the lead, with the models following up. This is turning into a battle of the D-List celebrities.
Coach and his daughter wander into a random house and start painting, though some people—maybe the owners?—are wondering why the heck these people are painting their wall and mock the poor paint job. "That is ugly," one of the men says in Spanish. Although there's a language barrier, Allie realizes they made a mistake when the men look at them blankly when they point to a clue card. Meanwhile, the cute brothers lose their earlier lead because of a lost a paint brush, so they scramble to retrace their steps and try to find it.
After painting, teams have to go to the Palacio Baburizza, a 90-year-old chalet. The Big Brother lovers make it there first and win a trip to Vancouver—Jordan is one lucky reality star. The models get there second but incur a 30-minute penalty for walking down the hill instead of taking the funicular. So second place goes to the super moms. In a shocking turn of events, the cowboys—who were nearly last in most of the race—somehow sped up after the cable walk and wrangled themselves third place. As Jet says, "Cowboys aren't necessarily just hicks from Texas." The cute brothers make it there fourth, but the lost paint brush costs them a 15-minute penalty.
After their time-outs are done, Mr. and Miss South Carolina clock in at seventh and the cute brothers in at eighth. Unfortunately, a spill on the cable wire forces the already snail-paced Adrian to start the roadblock over. It cost the high school sweethearts the competition and they were eliminated.
Things start getting tense when alliances form and people allow teams to cut in line—hells, no.