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An Open Note to Matt Gross

On Wednesday, we'll find out how Matt Gross does in Croatia. Matt Gross is the NYT's Frugal Traveler "Around the World in 90 Days" columnist who we would trade places with in about three point zero seconds. We don't hate him. We want to be him. See the difference?

Though he won't get these tips before he heads to Croatia, we're in a tip-dispensing mood.

Matt, avoid Hvar Town. It breaks our hearts to say this, but unless you're interested in mid-day techno blasts along the harbor of what used to be possibly the most relaxed, gorgeous island village in the Adriatic, stay on that Jadrolinija ferry when it docks at Hvar, or, barring that, alight and then flee to check out another part of the island.

These days, Brac, Korcula, Vis, and sylvan Mljet are all better bets than Hvar for visitors interested in local life. While many of these islands (Korcula in particular) see a fair share of tourists, none of them have that hellish drunk-at-noon party circuit feel.

Whatever you do, Matt, also be prepared to leave Croatia with bruised, scabbed, and punctured feet. Few visitors escape without having been attacked by rocks and immobile sea creatures.

[Image via mhodges/Flickr]